In our busy lives, it’s easy to overlook the reasons behind our choices. How often do we take action out of genuine alignment with our values versus simply following an ingrained sense of obligation? Understanding the difference can be transformative. Today let’s dive into the world of choices, particularly exploring the concepts of primary and secondary choices, and how becoming conscious of these can help us live more authentically.

What Does It Mean to Have a Choice?

At its core, a choice is something you can either do or not do—it’s that simple. But in society, the term choice is often used interchangeably with obligation. When you feel obliged to do something, the element of freedom is lost, leaving you with compliance rather than true choice. This blurring between choice and obligation can have a profound impact on how we navigate our lives and relationships.

For instance, think about commitments. Once we commit to something, we often feel that we must...

Recently, I had the opportunity to attend a conference, which has always been a source of inspiration and community for me. The energy there is so warm and welcoming, and it feels like a big family reunion every time. The people are diverse, fun, and deeply connected, making each experience truly enriching.

One memorable moment from the conference was sparked by a speaker who mentioned the concept of “sandpaper” in relationships. It was a lighthearted metaphor, yet so true. We all chuckled, recognizing how certain interactions can feel abrasive, depending on the situation. This idea of ‘sandpaper’ stuck with me, especially as I encountered a situation that challenged my usual patterns of behavior.

During the conference, I found myself in a scenario that triggered an old survival pattern—a pattern where I avoid conflict at all costs. It happened when I was saving seats for my team in the front row, only to have someone else claim the seat I had reserved....

As I continue on my path of self-discovery and healing, I often reflect on the earlier stages of my journey—back when I first started noticing my patterns. At the time, I was consumed with shame every time I recognized one of these patterns in myself. My initial reaction was, "This is bad. I shouldn’t be doing that." But over time, and with compassionate understanding, I’ve learned not to step into the field of judgment so quickly.

One of the most powerful things I did during those early stages, which helped me begin to dissolve the patterns or, at the very least, diminish their control over my behavior, was simply acknowledging them. When I noticed I was running a pattern, I no longer made myself wrong for it. Instead, I chose to witness it.

I would take a step back—into my heart—and observe my behavior with curiosity, rather than judgment. I started to ask myself, "What is this pattern really about? What are the nuances of my experience that allow...

Have you ever experienced that moment when you just wanted to hit the snooze button and take a day off? This morning was one of those for me.

Recently, I've delved into the world of a new language associated with connecting with more people. The underlying intention, however, is what drives me — mastering these skillsets to offer more resources, especially for folks like you and me. That, for me, is a powerful motivator.

I recall the early days of exploring the internet when everything seemed pretty fast-paced. Now, with technology evolving even faster, staying up-to-date demands acquiring new skill sets. This realization underscores the significance of having reliable and consistent support across various aspects of life.

In this journey, I'm truly grateful for my mentor, who is walking alongside me as I navigate building a more robust online presence. His unwavering support is invaluable.

Being transparent about hitting a technological wall, I connected with Stephen. The...

“Horses and Their Ability to Heal” by Gloria Lybecker, originally published in Natural Awakenings Inland Northwest. 

"The horse has evolved over millions of years as a prey animal. Their nervous systems are wired to react quickly to known or perceived threats. The physical structure of a horse's brain, with its enlarged amygdala, closely resembles humans who have experienced trauma. This gives them the ability to engage easily with those who struggle with hyper-vigilance and reactivity, providing the "neuroception of safety" (safety felt by the subconscious) and intuitive understanding of who is trustworthy and who is not. 

It is often said that horses see with their ears. This is true in that their visual to mental focus can be observed by where they point their ears. Yet every movement of the horse is communication: a twitch of its ear, a swish of its tail, the snake-like movements it can make with its neck. 

Horses also have huge hearts, averaging about...

What is at the root of ruptures in relationships? Is it possible to stay engaged? Have you ever experienced meeting another person and everything felt like it clicked? You finish each other's sentences and rift off the meaning underlying whatever concept you are exploring? Ahhh... the enjoyment of budding new relationships filled with infinite possibilities! It's likened to a "honeymoon" experience in relationships with powerful attractor fields at play.

What was it like when the "honeymoon" was over? When things didn't unfold as you had predicted or hoped for? When the first unexpected wrinkle in the smooth interactions was noticed - what was your felt experience in that moment? 

Perhaps your body paused in contraction, your brow furrowed, and you noticed you were unable to speak. Did you hold your breath?

Maybe your spine straightened, and you leaned forward aggressively, as a compulsion to take action was sparked within you "to communicate, take control, or set things...